Ever notice how, if you’re the baby of the family, you frequently date firstborns, and vice versa? See, one thing that determines your personality is the order in which you were born, in relation to your siblings (or lack thereof), and the role you played in your family.
The oldest child: the leader, a good citizen, responsible, responsive to parents’ expectations, well-organized, precise, and prone to perfectionism.
The youngest child: takes on the baby role, easygoing, spontaneous, used to being noticed and fussed over, charming, and manipulative.
The middle child: has less of a clear-cut role in the family; instead, she often makes a place for herself outside the family, creating a network of close friends, venturing away from the family physically, and breaking the mold intellectually as well.
The only child: often has characteristics both of first children (capable, perfectionistic) and of youngest children (attention-seeking, self-centered).
So who should we date? Erin Meanly from Glamour MAgazine called William Cane, author of The Birth Order Book of Love: How the #1 Personality Predictor Can Help You Find The One, to find out if it was true about firstborns dating lastborns, and if there was more to it.
He stressed that any two people can be compatible. “But birth order can tell you what a person’s personality will be like,” he said, “so you know what you’re getting into before you get into that relationship. Birth order is not a perfect predictor of personality, but it’s the best predictor that we have—better than gender, race, socioeconomic background, etc.”
So essentially, we want to replicate what our roles were, growing up at home? “Yes,” Cane said, “Dr. Walter Toman’s Duplication Theorem states that you will be happiest in your marriage with the same type of person you grew up with.”
Cane explained our best matches like this:
Female oldest child: The firstborn girl will usually have a leadership streak, so she’ll be happy with a lastborn. (That’s based on the pop-psychology view that opposites attract, he notes, although the research behind that isn’t conclusive.) A firstborn girl with younger brothers will be happiest with a lastborn guy with older sisters.
Female middle child: She is more adaptable than first or last. The middle child grew up with both older and younger, and can relate to all. She has the most potential for making a good match with anyone. And yes, middleborns are often neglected—statistically, they receive 12 percent less attention from their parents than their siblings. But the gender of her siblings is important. Britney Spears has an older brother and a younger sister. The important thing for her is her opposite sex sibling. She would be best with an older brother who has a younger sister or two younger sisters.
Female youngest child: The lastborn can be happiest with the firstborn, especially if she has an older brother, and she’ll be happier with a firstborn with a younger sister.
Female only child: If she’s going out with a firstborn, she’ll be used to an older authority figure because she grew up with her parents. She will understand the firstborn male, especially if he has younger sisters.
A twin: Your parents MAY call you a firstborn, but it’s a negligible effect. The best match for a twin is another twin or someone with a sibling very close in age.
No comments:
Post a Comment